On the marriage retreat possibility: Spoke with counselor at the New Beginnings place and she feels it would be very good for H and I. It takes the "tough love" approach and will not be me pursuing him to stay in our relationship. She said if I can get him to come, doesn't matter his mindset, to do so. They work from the respect/boundaries/accountability framework.
This is going to be my last effort, I'd guess you'd say, to see if H is truly willing to work on our marriage or if he is just biding his time to get out. I've drafted this email, let me know what you think! If I get a yes from him, everything will be put on hold. If no, it's go time in terms of confronting him, dropping the rope, etc...
I have been thinking about our conversation the other night and you said you were willing to go to the weekend marriage retreat. It is coming up next weekend, at least the closest one to us.(July 30th weekend)
If you are still willing to go, we need to register. There is a payment plan where we pay about $500 now and then make monthly payments of $100 each. Hotel is extra.
It seemed that you only wanted to go to appease me. I hope that is not the case and that you would truly like to see if we have a chance. Believe me, I am not ready to stay in a loveless marriage to someone who does not want me. I also do not want to be in a marriage where I am suspicious of behavior and don't feel safe, where secrets are kept and relationships pursued on the outside. Perhaps this weekend would be good for both of us to determine where we stand.
