New year, new thread, update of sorts..

[dmkdmkdmk]

So, I haven't posted in a looooooooooooong time. If you can call three months a long time.

I have been proceeding with the divorce process, and the hearing is scheduled for August 4.

Everything has kind of been going a long like usual, and H and I have been "warming up" to each other a bit more. In April it was like the bomb all over again, and we are back to where we text each other once in a while, share jokes, etc. He was even talking about buying me a Kindle (until I told him I bought one of my own). Naturally, I'm always waiting for another shoe to drop - so I went into panic mode when he invited me for coffee today...

He shows up with two black eyes - he fell last night when he was drinking at his nearby bars... He says he is probably an alcoholic and he is going to stop drinking liquor. His shopping list is always "Milk, Eggs, Rum". He thinks he can handle beer, but he doesn't want to drink liquor anymore - well, he WANTS to, and that's all he wants to do, and that's the problem.

The gist of it - he wanted to apologize for everything. He's been a terrible person for the past year plus. He threw away the only thing that really mattered. He says he owes me, the kids, my family, and his family an apology. He doesn't expect anything from me (nor did I offer anything - and I tell you, it is difficult not to jump right in and try to make things "all better").

He is not seeing HW anymore. He has no excuses, no reasons for why he did that. He says he wanted it all, he wanted to have everything, and now he doesn't have anything. I was the one person who was always there for him no matter what, and he threw that away.

He cried. He is going to start counseling. He has a few plans for making his life better.

WTF do I do now?