So the attorney called back and was, again, very helpful.
She said to simply write/type out all the things I expect the separation agreement to contain -which docs of hers you want to see -the conditions under which you will allow her personal debt to count as "marital' (e.g no flights or hotels for OM) -prepare the documents for the property exception -the "refund of the personal RSP I dumped in the account -the conditions of maintaining the household bills are paid -the liquidation of the W's vehicle -the uncontested personal vehicles of mine -the condition of custody -the conditions for splitting of household goods -the conditions and renewal date of spousal transfer pymts.
Get it all down and have a lawyer review it.
Tell W to put a list of three mediators together and supply a list of those you like.
Interview three. Pick one and set an appt. (L recommended one ofr two as somewhat "pro-man". At least fully neutral)
Get the easy stuff done first. Then hammer out the toughies.
Up here, you MUST get an attorney to sign of that you have been apprised of your rights regarding property as contained in the agreement. Then you both sign.
The Sep AGrrement can run forever. All it takes is one person to initiate divorce and the Sep Agreemnt is the ruling paper.
So I need a Sep Agreement pronto. Then I can work on W and the A (see exposure and continued pressure)
I feel I understand it better now and my next steps. I'd rather not but I might start my notes in spare moments on vacation and type it out when I get back.
L said the Sep Agreemnt IS my FIREWALL during the process. In fact, she said it is usaually THIS piece that causes most of the D "reconsideration"
