Had a good weekend. Still no R talk with H, still no letter written. But had a heck of a LMing session last night!!!!
H had a small little epiphany yesterday afternoon too. Small steps and small signs of change....
Here was the sit:
BIL and his family are on vacation. Their house is in the flood zone that y'all saw on the news yesterday in KY. H calls his brother and has a conversation with him.
BIL view is this: we're 4 hours away on vacation, have a cabin rented for a week, the neighbors say the house is fine, but not sure about water in the basement or garage, power has been cut, neighbor will keep him informed.
H's view: only 4 hours, you can drive home and then drive back, you need peace of mind, it's only a short drive, you really should check on things.... I lost count of how many times H said that in the 30 minute conversation.
H hangs up and says to me, if it were me, I'd be driving back to check on things and have peace of mind.
I reply it's only peace of mind if everything is OK, otherwise what is he going to do? If things are bad, and he goes back to the vacation how does that help the family? If things are bad and he skips the vacation to stay at the house, how does that help the family? It seems like the roads are still closed, and the power is still off so I'm not sure what would going home truely accomplish? BIL seems like he's thought this through and talked to his W about it. He seems to be enjoying vacation and has the attitude that there's nothing he can do yet anyway so he might as well enjoy the planned vacation with his kids and wife.
Yes, I understand you would need peace of mind, but there's no guarantee you would get it, and if things were really bad, coming back and telling me would ruin my vacation too.
20 minute later H came in the room and told me he texted his brother and said he didn't mean to sound like he was telling him what to do or trying to influence his decision.
YAY!!!
Then later last night we had some funny exchanges... H asked me to pop his back since it was hurting....he even asked if my wrists could handle it (i have carple tunnel syndrome and it flares up to the point I can't lift a pencil, let alone apply pressure to something- I noticed the ask and said thanks for asking and that yes, I could pop his back).....it wouldn't pop. He said it felt like it would sound like fireworks....I asked if he was sure it wasn't a ploy to get me on top of him...
Things just progressed from there. Of course the 112 degree weather and my skimpy nightie probably helped a little too.
I know not to go too fast or read into anything and to take things one day at a time.
