WAW EA told her to leave

[DangerDave]

Hey all!

Another big big day is here - first go at CC with an Imago therapist!

We had an up and down weekend for my Birthday, Friday she was totally po'd about my lack of support for her to go out riding with her friend on Saturday (my bday) and leaving me home with the kids to sort out the day and wait for her "arrival" later in the afternoon. She also threw out that a GF of her's asked her to go rafting that day as well, one of our kids was all for it too (not realizing the bday) - I thought both were amazingly self centered and probably another test to goad me into an angry response. I simply did not give any support (no have fun, do you what you want) just stayed quiet or whatever to either one(what did she expect?)and maintained composure. Saturday she simply hit the gym, returned home early and since the whole family was there, put on a smiley face for the rest of the day.

First thing Sunday she was out early for a ride at 7am, coming home around noon. She did say that she told her bike pals that she was in a *itty mood that morning, I said that I didn't do anything to piss her off, she just said it's everything going on -her typical response. She also said that it seemed to her that I didn't want her going on Saturday which made her angry, told her I never said that (and why care if so?). She also told me about her plans for the gym this am - sleep on the way to the concert and back so she could still get up and make her 4:45am class - boy it's good to have your priorities down!

Concert went ok - dinner there was more R talk than I hoped for but I think it may have worked out well. She was going down the path of all the hurt and anger I've caused, my missing out on life, the kids and more and that she knew where "I was at" in the R. Well I turned it I think to throwing her off the scent - I asked why she even came tonight, she said that it was the right thing to do(as a W I suppose)and didn't want to hurt me. I just said it would have hurt a bit, I could have brought one of the kids or a friend and had a good time just the same. I also said that our R couldn't continue like this for much longer, it wasn't healthy at all. She replied with "Well maybe I don't know where you are then?)- I simply reinforced that no she doesn't and she can't read my mind nor I hers. She said we're just two strangers to each other living together - I know it upset her apple cart! She went back to the I don't know who you are, and I changed and is just waiting for the bomb of me returning to my past to drop(told here IC that as well she said). I told her that she too had changed and like her own statement, not all for the good and left it at that.

So was posting this morning on FB and she im'd me there - she said she's scared about our appt today, I told her I was as well. Also asked if she really wanted to converse via im's, that I'm not used to it - she said yes as she feels she feels afraid of me at getting angry at her (which has not happened at all for months)when talking face to face. Told her fine if that's how she wants to talk I'd go along and that she has nothing to fear from me now or ever. I also told her she scares me everyday too, but that those feelings are mine and would tell her about them if and when I want to. Simply said that I hope this Dr. can help, she replied with "What do you expect out of this Dr?)I said first that it was a loaded question that I wasnt going to answer and she knew it and two that "It will be what WE make it to be" and that's how it ended.

So 4pm to the Imago T and we will see how it goes, she doesn't have a clue about this type of T, so her ideal of being able to vent all her resentment, anger and justification of leaving probably won't evolve as she envisions.

Any last minute advice before heading into the frying pan (from out of the fire! - s/b cooler there!!)

Thanks All

DD