Mmm, Gucci Loafer does have a point, but when in a R talk one has to be honest, unless you just don't say anything. The R chat was initiated by your W, and it seems things were heading in the direction of reconciliation. So, one has to clear the air of some stuff.
She knows what you want ... perhaps it's time to go semi-dark again??? Give her the space and time to miss you. She does know that you have another life, single friends, that include women. I don't think you come across as a victim anymore. Perhaps there was a time, but not anymore.
I get the feeling/impression, and I may be wrong, that your W is finding it difficult to let you go (she obviously still has strong feelings for you), but she wants to be right about what she did and is having a hard time reconciling these two issues. Maybe, if she thinks she was wrong, then she won't be able to trust her own emotions, and that may be very important to her. That she trust herself, that is.
Just some stuff to think about.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim