Hi Sunny- You've commented and supported me over the last bit and I see you are struggling so let me offer my feedback/advice. (I've changed username- used to be Cxllasdad)
You are in this situation because YOU haven't decided; not him. I believe by REACTING to every nuance of everything he says or does, it is impossible for YOU to pick a direction (whether it be GAL'ing or 180's or whatever.
Until YOU DECIDE where your personal integrity lies and pick "a road for you", he'll keep delaying your departure.
He, like any WAS, has you right where he wants and needs you- 1-Compartmentalized into his life. 2-Available 3-Pacified 4-Believing his contadictory positions make sense 5-Waiting
I don't recall seeing an echange w H where he gets all bent out of shape with you. Why is that? Because their anger means they are NOT getting what they want from you to fit their situation. GET OUT OF THE BOX Don't be afraid of conflict with him. It means he "feels" you moving away. We know every WAS is selfish/self-centered. And they NEED to control everything to FIT their sitch/fantasy.
DO WHAT YOU WANT!! Break the chains! AND Drop the Rope.
The sooner you go where YOU want to go with YOUR LIFE, the sooner you'll have the answer.
And I think YOU are thinking of the wrong question for that answer.
The question isn't about what he wants.
The question is WHAT do you want?
A Man who can't decide? A man who procrastinates on decision regarding OTHERS lives? A man that wants his cake...... A man that sees 20 years as 'disposable'?
You know those answers.
So what and who (not specifically but personality-wise) DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE.
Look at it this way.
You know what I am doing in my sitch. I am exposing and still trying to love the shell that remains of my wife for the sake of our D and "us" I'm gonna be taking abuse from all sides and this could still go the way of D. I KNOW that she and OM are lying to anyone and everyone ABOUT ME in order to keep this rationalized/enabled
Which type of man is more appealing to you? Which type of man do you deserve?
My apologies if it's a little harsh but you really need to start looking at YOUR self-interests.
His waffling and such gives you hope. What you need is a future. GO GET ONE. And know you can-whether with or without him.
