Well, I've been sitting and staring at a blank screen for what seems like ever, trying to figure out how to start that letter to H. Just not happening.
2 nights ago, the kids had friends sleep over, so I asked H if it would be ok if I slept in the bed. He replied that he was tired. I replied back, that all I was expecting was sleep. He said, Oh, ok then.
Last night,after we watched a movie with our DD, I was in the hall, H was turning off the TV in the family room, as I walked into the bedroom to get something, H asked if I wanted the TV on or off. I replied it doesn't matter. H came into the bedroom, I left with a glass to the kitchen. I went back into the bedroom to grab a pillow and calmly said "does that mean you want me to sleep on the couch?" He replied that it was up to me. I grabbed soan empty soda can and left for about 5 minutes to cry in the kitchen. I walked back in to the room and H started talking to me about something, so I stood by the bed and answered nicely- still deciding what to do. I ended up sleeping in the bed, but quietly crying myself to sleep.
It's been civil conversation when we talk, but the elephant is obviously in the room and he seems to be getting bigger by the day.
@ par- detach just means to back away and be an observer in the relationship- like hovering above and looking down type perspective. I actually think you need to move on. Tell her very strongly but nicely, that she married someone else and that was her choice. Now you're choosing to move on with your life without her. She needs to stay with her new husband.
