Just found out she already filed

[newmama]

but I'll never say anything bad about her mom to her. I know STBXW loves DD and I'm thankful for that. Also since DD's half me and half her she can't deny loving part of me...ok enough with my philosophical statements.

Well done, Romeo, and this is exactly what I think as well. If we insult the other parent to the child, then we are kind of insulting the child!

Today I'm feeling a bit lonely- even at work. Don't know why but my mind keeps latching on to "I need a woman in my life". I keep reminding myself I don't need a woman but I think that's where the difference between a need and want comes in. Will I breathe, eat, function without one? of course, is it all I want? no. I miss the intimacy, the connection I was used to. Well not soo much the former as I got turned down a lot- but I've always been persistent

OK need and want...good distinction....but I do ask again: how does one know when they are ready? I mean for me, I was up and down with to date or not...I was actually SCARED that dating meant relationship which meant rejection. Also that if I dated, I would be moving on. And sex is a human need (not that you need to go out there and have a one night stand or something) but I think since men tend to have higher sex drives, they tend to start dating after the divorce sooner than women do.

ok maybe not but she probably gets hit on several times a week so she's probably not even worried about that stuff. It makes a difference. For me I have to wonder if I'll ever find someone or is this the end of the line for me in terms of having a partner.

I have been there! But just going on this one date even if I never see the guy again has renewed my optimism that good people are out there. And dads with kids are more likely to meet good women!

I think this is more about your anxiety about being alone and not knowing what the future holds. Btw, women re-marry far less often than men do after divorce. That could be due to choice though, who knows.

YES it is your anxiety. Which is normal of course!

And I think women re-marry less often due to the fact that
1) men in their 40s are into women in their 20s and 30s...so the older women (mid 30s+) have a smaller pool to choose from

2)having kids is "baggage"

3)being broke from losing their H's income is not appealing

But I could be wrong!