I think exposure backfired?

[AntoniaB]

I love that analogy too, it's brilliant. I can tell you one thing. I do think it's about ego. My husband and his affair partner bonded first (according to him) over the works of Ayn Rand. Those books are all about egoism and sort of running roughshod over others to attain your own happiness and self-worth even if it is at the expense of others. He and I read this stuff when we met, and at our young ages of lower 20s, it seemed perfect because we were in that "screw the parents we want to do what we want" portion of our lives. Then we grew up. But apparently maybe he regressed, because for him to be attracted to that stuff in his 40s and use it to justify his affair is sickening and entirely about his own ego.