How to explain to Spouse....

[koliver0821]

Soxfan- Sorry I didnt see your post when i posted. The truth of the matter is that you have to do these things for you. If you are looking for a pat on the back, tell him when he says something like that, that you feel hurt. If you don't he will continue to speak that way.

As for him listening. My wife swears I have ADD. To be honest, I just internalize so much. I feel like I'm always thinking about different things. Even when she talks to me. I found out recently that have epilepsy. That much of my behavior can be contributed to that as well as my problems with listening.

Did you have an affair and come clean about. Maybe not while with him? Perhaps thats why he might accuse. However, again his jealousy is his feeling. If you want to turn it around, his jealousy could be construed as being insecure or not knowing where he stands. I know thats exactly what my wife was worried about. I have never cheated in any relationship. In fact I have backed away from some women (back in my younger years) that I thought were involved with other people. Couldnt handle the drama. Perhaps he is jealous because he doesn't know how much you love him. That's what my wife did. Coincidentally, when I found out my wife had an affair, guess who became the jealous one...... ME. When she asked for a separation, I basically thought she didnt love me. When we got back together, I was insecure and thought she was still having an affair.