Mystik, I read your posts and I can really feel you. I like you. Our posts are not that similar but I see weakness in you and I see strength. I feel your writing because I feel like I am the same way. So damn wishy washy. Please don't take this as a cut down, it was not mean't to be. One moment I am sure that I need to cut her out of my life and be done and the next I am remembering memories of happy times and say why not again. Why can't it be again? She says she is coming home this weekend but she is so messed up I really don't believe her. I really don't. Is that someone I want that I can't even believe what she is saying? 1. She doesn't have a way here unless i go get her, she has not ask even though I offered 2. I really think that she is just stringing me along to be there if all else fails. It is a really crappy feelling. I was married for 9 years. Had sex last week with her. It is crazy to me that she doesn't love me anymore but that is what i feel. It is an inner spirit telling me that. I am not judgeing her by her words-they say she wants to come back, her actions say different although she does call every day. I just don't know what I want to do. It is baffling. My best damn friend, my lover, is a stranger to me.
