i think with people who may be emotionally abusive the rules are different. if i do that, he berrates me for half an hour, feels awesome, more angry and then hates me. my situation is no9t 'typical', in that he is abusive and narcassistic. i know everybody keeps asking me 'why stay then', but i'm here to try to save what's left of my relationship if it's possible, or atleast find out teqniques that work.
You are right abq. There are significant differences, along with similarities.
You can't change him. The best you can hope for is that your behavior motivates him to seek help. He has no motivation to do so. The worse he treats you, the more you try to please him. That's like housebreaking a puppy by giving him a doggie treat every time he craps on the floor.
Originally Posted By: MrBond
Eventually he'll start changing his behavior. It'll be a slow process but it'll come up. You just need to re-program him.
That is rarely the case with abusive men. abq's H has also been physically abusive and walking away could get her hurt very badly.
