When he starts getting abusive, then tell him that you are not going to be talked down to and will continue the discussion when he can talk in a rational manner, then walk away.
He'll start to follow you around and say you're "running away" but firmly tell him that you are not and are perfectly happy to discuss issues with him, but not when he will talk down to you. That you are his wife and expect to be treated the same way he would like you to treat him.
Saying something like that every now and then is fine. You're not accusing him of anything, just stating how you feel and how you want to feel. You can do it.
Eventually he'll start changing his behavior. It'll be a slow process but it'll come up. You just need to re-program him. Fact is that you've been doing the same things over again, yet expecting a different result. Do something different.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
