Well she kept calling today and I would not answer even called my work. She finally texts that she is sorry, she made a mistake and that her place is with me, she said she would do anything to work this relationshp out and wants to go to marriage counsling and to rehab to control the pills. Yes, I am pretty happy.She ask if I could ever forgive her. I told her that I already had forgiven her and forgotten about this huge mistake. She told me that forever with me is what is wanted. You may think I am nuts. Most of the people that I have been talking to think so. Yes, tht got a somewhat biased side when I tell my story but I don't think it is too biased. She flipped out, made a huge mistake, she nevered cared for the guy, she didn't have time to. But I am sure she did sleep with him. This a issue that I am going to havea problem with. I have to remind myself that I have done the same.
But I am sorry there is a double standard when you a talking about your girl. Guys don't want anyone touching their girl. It is an issue that I will bring up in counceling but I truely can't hold against her since I did the same. I just have always thought that her body was mine, I think that girls think different about sex, it is more about emotion that lust. Maybe I am wrong. I am wrong about a lot of things. Right now, it is just spilled milk. I get butterflies when I see her and she is coming flying home this weekend for good so she says. I think she will. I am going to get over my issues and be a good husband. All I wanted was one more chance. Many on this board never get the chance. I have had many.
I have had chances in the past and made promises and then went back to the same ole me. I have to make sure that for her to change her ways that I must change mine. I have to not neglete her, call her names or emotional abuse her. I think that if she feels loved and wanted she might not want or need the pills to dim her wits and dim her life because she would enjoy it. Maybe, maybe not. But she said she would seek help and do whatever it took to get this relationsip back to where we were best friends again. She was mine. I have told her my deepest secrets and feelings. I want my friend back also, I don't care about the sex or having my lover back, just a bonus. I truel miss my friend. I have lots but none as close, I don't know how what got into this situation and how it got so bad. Just neglete by me.
Cancel all that. I talked to her mother and she said that she was getting kicked out the apartment because she was knocking on doors asking people for pain meds. You have got to be kidding me. So, she has no where to go except to me. She didn't love me she was using me. I was the last option. Crazy? I am going. This girl is not the one I feel in love with. She looks like it. She just called and ask me to quit texting her because her husband is mad. This is nuts that I let someone use me like this. She doesn't hurt or love me she just had no where else to go. I was so fooled. I am stupid.
Cancel all that. I talked to her mother and she said that she was getting kicked out the apartment because she was knocking on doors asking people for pain meds. You have got to be kidding me. So, she has no where to go except to me. She didn't love me she was using me. I was the last option. Crazy? I am going. This girl is not the one I feel in love with. She looks like it. She just called and ask me to quit texting her because her husband is mad. This is nuts that I let someone use me like this. She doesn't hurt or love me she just had no where else to go. I was so fooled. I am stupid.
She might be suffereing from the pain of the fallout from you two. Of course you would feel like the LBS is the best option after this.
Nah, she is a pill popper. This is the reason we broke up. It is not the cause of the pain. She cares more about the drugs than her relationships, daughter or me. In fact, I don't think she cares at all. She called today and said that she had been screwing everything up and that she did not want to hurt me or anybody yet, she doesn't change. She isn't trying to come into my life. She says one thing and does another.
Nah, she is a pill popper. This is the reason we broke up. It is not the cause of the pain. She cares more about the drugs than her relationships, daughter or me. In fact, I don't think she cares at all. She called today and said that she had been screwing everything up and that she did not want to hurt me or anybody yet, she doesn't change. She isn't trying to come into my life. She says one thing and does another.
Do you see how the pain pills would be a "death spiral", like alcohol? Its that they pop these pain killers, do some [censored] that causes them emotional pain, and they take more pills to kill this pain, do some more crazy [censored], etc.
Maybe you should take her home provided she gets some professional help?
Maybe, I have suggested it. I really care about her but she is hurting me badly. I have put her in rehab 3 times now. I guess we just keep doing it until she gets in right. I have offered to come get her. I don't know why. I have been trying to detach, meaning I have not been answering her calls. I have responded to her texts. But she calls everyday for a total of about 2 minutes. If I ask her a question she says she is feeling pressured so I just quit calling. I don't know what to do or what I should do. That is why I am on this board. I am just hoping someone will give the advice that works. I am trying to set her free. I would get her the help. I just don't know if she really is going to come this weekend or not. She said-this is not my life, i belong with you, i want to be there by the weekend. But, I can't believe her from one day to the next. I have asked in a text how she was going to get here. No response. I told her I would come get her. No response. I think she is keeping my hanging on the rope so that I will be there if she needs me. Probably try and start a fight or not even call at all the next couple of days so that she has a reason not to come. I just don't know?
Well she kept calling today and I would not answer even called my work. She finally texts that she is sorry, she made a mistake and that her place is with me, she said she would do anything to work this relationshp out and wants to go to marriage counsling
Wait...isn't she married to someone else right now? Did I miss a page?
Quote:
Yes, I am pretty happy.
You were going to off yourself over this woman just a few weeks ago and she didn't give a RATS A$$ about you. Now you are ... happy to have her back? My friend...think about this.
Quote:
She ask if I could ever forgive her. I told her that I already had forgiven her and forgotten about this huge mistake.
Or have you just set it aside?
Quote:
You may think I am nuts.
I don't think you are nuts. My opinion is you are a fool.
Quote:
But I am sorry there is a double standard when you a talking about your girl. Guys don't want anyone touching their girl
"Their Girl"? How old are you? She is not YOUR girl. She is married to another guy, right? Or did she just run off to marry another guy? Either way - not your girl. She is a drug addicted person who is in a bind and there you are - ready to save the day. EVEN THOUGH HER THOUGHTLESS ACTIONS ALMOST COST YOU YOUR LIFE. I've never even met you and I was probably more worried about you taking the next breath than she was.
Don't rescue her! You've only recently started saving yourself, for Pete's sake!
Greek
Me45 H46 T25 M22 S21 & 19 D13 Separated and filed 8/08 Moved home 11/08
That is correct. I really did think about killing myself. The gun that I bought is setting right here beside me. I didn't buy any bullets. I don't understand the codependancy attraction. I try to convince myself that you guys really don't know the whole story but you do. I didn't lie. I didn't leave anything out. We had good memories before. She is married. I told her the other day that I do not talk to or mess with married women. It is crazy that I feel this way what is stupider is my post that you probably didn't read. I thought she was coming back because she missed me and was in love with me, nope, her mother told me that the apartment complex told her she had to leave because she was knocking on doors asking people for pain meds. God, I am dumb. I am 41 for your info with a high IQ, a golf pro, lots of friends, just a low low self esteem right now. And I am just not thinking clearly. I really want her to come back. Why? I can't answer that myself. You think that calling me stupid and a fool bothers me, hell no, I know that I am. There is no logical reason for me or anyone to say that I should be with her. Her parents want me to be but they are shocked that I am still willing. My parents can't believe that I would take her back but will support any decision I make. I don't know if it is some kind of competition to me or why I feel the sense of loss that I do. It hurts. She is sorry as they come. It is plain stupid. I know it.
admitting that you were thinking about killing yourself, i commend you. oh how i have been in those shoes. inbetween daugther almost 3 and son 5 months i had a miscarriage when i was 4 months pregnant.
during months 3-4 h walked out on daughter and i with no car ironically yet again. i would have to carry d to store and groceries h did not care on damn bit.
i was concidering aborting the baby - hate to say it but id on't believe in it at all. i felt so trapped unloved alone and then i'm at work 1 day and start to bleed heavily - one of many bad days was the ultrasound dr saying no, i'm sorry there is no heartbeat - blamed me blamed him it was horrible
go to have the d & c and i wake up hitting h mean and angry to the nurses and they don't understand why - i blame him forme loosing the baby
his mother said i killed the baby.
the next morning after surgery he takes daughte to his mothers and leaves me for weeks - i did try to kill myself
Me 39 H 30 d 18 previous marriage d 2.5 with H s 4.5months with H Seperation Nov09 july i'm dim to dark - set internal deadline
