Nothing fits

[MichelleLT]

Don't guess. Don't make assumptions.

Either ask him, or let it go.

Don't waste your energy on her, just friends or whatever.

If you allow him to stay, it seems to me there will be conditions.

Either he starts doing work, or your R goes back to being co-parents to Marc. That is a condition.

You could also give him the condition that if you are going to stop attempts at R right now until he is ready to do the work, then he has to move out.

Marc may look up to his dad, and he may be "special needs", but he's not stupid. Nor is he blind.

He will see that you are not the bad guy.

You are the one setting good boundaries, acting with respect and asking for respect.

You are the one striving for a more healthy and complete you.

You are the one doing work.

You are the one succeeding at it.