Google "divorce and insurance coverage (insert your state) law"
states differ in laws, but some have clauses that either the spouse has to continue to provide coverage, or money is added to alimony so the other can get coverage.
Last night when he called he asked if he should come home, I said you want to be divorced, why would you do that? well he never did come home last night.
He must not have thought about this very much, he did not take a change of cloths, he took no toiletries, his beloved hair gel he can't live without is still here.
He did mention coming home tonight to tell the Girls. I am going to let him do the talking since this is what he wants. any thing else I should know or do ? A friend said when he says it is because he is not happy, i should ask him in front of the girls if being alone is going to make him happy. still not sure what I think about this.
shelby
Me:43 H:43 T:20 YRS M:15 YRS Bomb: 6/9/08 Bomb#2 7/6/10 Served with papers at work 7/13/10 DD:14, DD:11
I think that although that is true and he not doing his duty as a father that it is a form of manipulation. My ex used my daughter all the time to try to make me feel guilty and I could see right through it.
Sorry your sitch isn't looking good Shelby not only with your M but even your post M situation.
These are the times in which greatness and courage are formed to make us better people. Although D is something no one here ever wanted, we must accept that our partners choice do effect us.
It is of the utmost importance that you do not fall victim to the situation. You first need to let go of your aspirations to heal your M. Take care of yourself and be the best mom you can be to your Ds.
I read somewhere here that tough events go away but tough people don't. I like like that saying and have started to live it.
You can too! Be strong, gr8
Last edited by gr8 day 2B alive; 07/14/1005:22 PM.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
I am nervous about tonight, to actually see him since he had me served and then telling the Girls. I guess I will be there when he tells them, but I still think he should do the talking since this is what he wants.
I think it will be rough tonight also because I am sure he will be wanting to pack up some stuff to take with him....wait...what he if he wants to stay here for a little bit untill he finds a place to stay? Do I let him stay here ? We do not have a spare bedroom, does he stay on the couch ?
Me:43 H:43 T:20 YRS M:15 YRS Bomb: 6/9/08 Bomb#2 7/6/10 Served with papers at work 7/13/10 DD:14, DD:11
I would have H tell the kids. Do not speak for him. This is his decision. If he wants to stay while he finds a place let him stay on the couch.
It will be hard tonight, I recall the night we told the kids. Granted I had a 5 &2 yo and the 5yo really didn't understand, but it was hard just the same.
Do not break down in front of your kids, they need to see you as a strong woman. Breathe often and know you WILL be OK, because you will be. I know this from experience.
good luck, gr8
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
I will try to be strong. I really do not know what to expect tonight.
I know I said I would call some lawyers today, but with waiting for husband to stop by and the Daughters here I think I will do it tomorrow morning. I have off from work, but have a DR. appointment, so I will leave early for that and make some calls before my appointment.
Me:43 H:43 T:20 YRS M:15 YRS Bomb: 6/9/08 Bomb#2 7/6/10 Served with papers at work 7/13/10 DD:14, DD:11
If your kids don't suspect anything there will be a lot of questions on their part, lots of emotion and lots of tears.
They will immediately start to think how this is going to effect their lives. You need to tell them what we tell you here: Everything will be OK and make sure they know you love them and will be there for them.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
Well H just called, he will be here around 8:00 to talk to the Girls and he said give them a hug. I can not remember the last time he has given either of them a hug.
He also said he wants to talk to me about finances. I have no idea what this means. ??? I said "now you have learned to talk, you havent wanted to talk in months, now you learned how to talk". Probaly should not have said that.
He will also be picking up some cloths and stuff to take with him.
I hope I can keep it together tonight. I do not want to cry and I do not want to get too angry and say things I wished I wouldn't have.
I think my oldest Daughter has an idea, but I havent asked her yet. should I still wait for husband to start the talk.
Me:43 H:43 T:20 YRS M:15 YRS Bomb: 6/9/08 Bomb#2 7/6/10 Served with papers at work 7/13/10 DD:14, DD:11
