Now, I have been reading on here and some say to act cheerful and pay attention when talking together and some say to not make eye contact and stay detached and cool.
Yes,there seems quite a bit of misunderstanding. Here's the thing....you don't act so cheerful you appear to be goofy. Some LBH's try too hard and it makes them appear to be downright stupid. That is a turn-off to anyone who is halfway normal....so a WAW falls in that percentage somewhere.
Neither is "detaching" meant to be rude behavior. That is what a lot of people don't get. If you act like you are in junior high and ignoring her while she's sitting right next to you....she will just shake her head at your games. So don't do either of those actions, okay?
Let's say she was your younger female counsin. How would you treat a younger, wayward, counsin who you had to sit through an hour of watching some program? You would politely tollerate her. No rude behavior, but you aren't really into her. She doesn't have your heart, mind & soul in her back pocket. You are relaxed, polite, can even smile if it's the right time. But....and here's the big thing....you do not over-kill. You don't act all happy, gleeful jumping up and kicking your boots b/c you get to sit with her for an hour. Does that make it a little more clear?
Detaching is an attitude. It's like you have dropped the rope you had tied around her and she's free to fly away. You don't get all bent out of shape over her. She doesn't affect you. When you "really" get to the detachment stage....you'll know it. Until then, you fake it till you make it.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
