Taylor, You are allowing your pain and anger to drive your train. You cannot do think rationally when you are angry or hurt. Step back from your situation and start doing things for YOU. Start thinking about what YOU can do to make YOUR life better.
Every poster has given you excellent advice and they all have said the same thing....focus on YOU, do for YOU.
Let me tell you something, your h may think he's hot, but I bet that he thinks all of the women are looking at him and coming on to him....they most likely are looking and thinking he's nuts. It's his fantasy to live out. The Wonderland will turn to Oz in due time.....
Take are of you. You are allowing him to get into your head all of the time and you are allowing your emotional state to affect your health. You've got to take back the control over you.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
