The whole legal side of this is way over my head, but PIBs advice sounds great.
Your lists of positives are growing, do you see that? It also seems that you have had a shift in your mood, more accepting that this is going to work out and his actions towards you are genuine and loving.
Well, yes, I am probably more accepting. I have skimmed through my old posts and decided to print them (all 358 pages). I want to read them carefully and see if I can identify recurrent patterns. Of course we all know about my major frustrations (e.g. OW's continued employment and my H's offices finances). I just do not want to be caught in endless loops (and I can see no point in making the same mistakes all over).
Which reminds me I never posted the link to my old thread. Here it is: Weeding out the bad
"You don't throw a whole life away just 'cause it's banged up a little"
Tom Smith in "Seabiscuit"
I am in a bit of a funk lately and I do not think it has anything to do with my H's behavior. My bro's visit finished yesterday in quite a positive way, though we never had the R talk. H was much more present in the last few days, and we went out to dinner three times with my bro. My H actually proposed some of the outings . We had our massage and enjoyed it. We are going to Shania Twainn tonight.
The problem now is me: I am so... listless? I cannot feel any kind of enthusiasm, not for my H, not for the coming holidays, not for work, or for anything. I am tired and short tempered. Only my D has some ability to make me laugh. Even writing in the BB seemed as too much effort.
It may just be a reaction to all the stress I've been through. Or post-flu blues. Or all of the above.
Right now I am just waiting through the funk, hoping it will be over soon and reading books for pleasure, not information. Nice change.
I sometimes wonder if I will ever regain the sense of belonging that I once had with my H. The sense of something special, of being partners against the world. I know it can be done, because I have seen it. I just do not feel it right know and I wonder if I ever will.
I want to go home... which is stupid, because I am home. It just does not feel like home.
I am rambling...
"You don't throw a whole life away just 'cause it's banged up a little"
Tom Smith in "Seabiscuit"
Hi..give yourself time...you have been sick...there has been so much going on that you are intitled to all those mixed feelings. Just don't let them pull you down too far..at least you recognize them.
If you hadn't just been so sick, Opt, I'd say you were describing a depressive episode...(any history of that?)
But give your body a chance to really recover before jumping to any conclusions! (How long have you been feeling this way? How long since your flu passed?)
I'd say that having visitors for quite a while (even welcome beloved ones cause STRESS), having your H's behaviour to deal with (albeit better towards the end of the visit), all the uncertainty, the flu, the inevitable blues at saying goodbye to your bro...Yep, it's a pile up!
Be good to yourself...I read historical romance novels when I feel that way...just get lost in another world.
. We had our massage and enjoyed it. We are going to Shania Twainn tonight.