And here I am .... H's MLC ....

[ericmsant2]

T –

I hope you know that most of my posts come from my heart. They do. They are most often derived from my own personal EXPERIENCES, views, overall thoughts and feelings that I have HAD and still think about to this day. Sooo…..

I could not help but think about JB3 last post to you. You know the second question that he posted to you. The one that took some serious balls to put out there – the type of question that I am sure many have but do not have the guts to ask. Think about his question to you but before you do….

Let me tell you a little story T.

My D (who means the world to me) always comes to me whenever she gets any type of cut or scratch. It could be a scratch or in some cases it was a deep cut. A deep wound if you will. Whatever it is she comes to me with the same request. “Daddy can I have a band-aid”. Sometime she is crying, sometimes she is not.

A “band-aid”….think about that for one second. A band-aid. Many of us come here so wounded, so hurt, so exposed, so VULNERABLE. We use this place initially as a band-aid until we finally “get it”. Until we finally realize that our own healing is the most important task that we need to undertake. Yep, it is not saving the M that is the biggest hurdle – it is dealing with our own issues that are. Our own hurts, our own faults, our own sh*t. Some will be able to face it – some will not. Now, maybe I am only speaking about myself here – maybe I am not. This is just my opinion. After a while on these boards, things start to get a little better. Friendships are formed, a sense of healing comes, a sense of “I can do this” finally hits us.

And so we begin the process of putting humpty dumpty back together again. Sometime we feel like we have done it – “were okay now”, “we’ve healed”. The longer I am in this process of self discovery, healing and personal growth – the more I realize that this takes TIME.

You know, sometimes we put a band-aid on our wound. I am not saying that this is what you have done. Nope. I am simply giving you something to think about. That is it.

Sometime the wound is deep and we yet we still put a band-aid on it. A scab is formed over the wound and we feel better. Sometimes that band-aid can come in the form of someone else. Sometimes that band-aid is the quick fix that we think we need. It really is not. See, the band-aid will fall off and the scab will be exposed. The scab that covers the wound that is in us. You know, my advice to my D is always to remove the band-aid so that the cut has the air it needs to really heal. As I explain to her the longer you keep the band-aid on the longer it will take to heal the wound. BUT if you leave the band-aid on the wound takes a lot longer to heal and sometimes does not. My D has left the band-aid on too long and when she takes it off, the scab that has formed over the wound comes off and it is nasty. Looks nasty. Just “yucky”.

Now…I know you see where I am going with this. My advice to you would be this T – don’t cover the wound with a band-aid.

I am not judging you T – I never will. I have made the mistake of judging others in the past. I can only tell you that have lived it. I have for years covered the wounds with a band-aid. I have been married for 17 years. With my W for 19 years. Yet she never fully understood the depth of my pain. The depth of my wound. As your friend, you can cover it T – you can. We can “feel” a certain way and think we are okay. Yet the wound is still there. You can run from it – it will catch up to you. You will think you are healed when you are not. You may hurt others. I have. I know. I want you to save you the pain that you may feel later by not letting the wound heal on it’s own.

T – look at Jack’s first question….then sit back and think about it.

I know that whatever you do, you own. It is your truth.

Oh…and please don’t respond to this…just sit back and feel it and then live it.

God Bless,
Eric