Lessons learned at every bend

[holdingon]

Good for you to vent it here. I think we all can feel your frustration about OW working with your H. I KNOW you see this as a major problem, and surely a major stress for your H. Why don't they EVER think we have a clue? What is holding her there? Why does he keep her there? I don't understand either, I really don't.

A friend of mine asked me what H's attraction was to his OW. I really don't know. I have no clue. Except there is no history there, no kids, nothing to cause him any pain, nothing to cause him to look inside, nothing to remind him of the pain he has caused. I just finished "Wild at Heart" which is a very good book... it is for guys. I wish my H would read it.

You ARE doing great, and for now, you DO have to focus on the positives. Your NEW R is still young, give it time, hopefully these things will work themselves out. If your H will talk to you, maybe you can say AGAIN how much this bothers you...