Sunny D and Allen A!!! Although I hate to admit it, I know you guys are right and it is evident based on our last interaction with each other.
Since my last posting, I took it upon myself to initiate a lunch date and he agreed. For the first time in a very long time he was actually responsive to me when I called and texted. He actually called me back and was in a cheerful mood. Maybe he was still on an upslope from the fourth of July. Who knows
Anyhow we met up and had a great conversation and a few laughs! I asked him, "What would it take for us to be friends again?" He replied, "Be NICE and PATIENT." If only he knew...Any woman that can put up with him for 7 years is more than patient...
I asked him if we could have a play date once a week, nothing major but just some time we could spend together. He agreed!!!
However, he has NOT reached out to me since last Monday. I texted and called Saturday, Sunday, and today with no luck!!!!
I GET IT NOW!!!!! I will back off and allow him time and space needed. I was just hoping since our divorce court date is set for 8/12 we would be able to at least bond and start to spend quality time together. Moving forward I understand and realize that I MUST be patient and allow him time to process all this.
When I tried holding his hand, he said....Lets take baby steps....SO for the first time in a long time I don't have total control and if I want this marriage to work I MUST continue to work on myself and understand his needs.
When our lunch date ended, he sat in my car for an hour and dozed off to sleep and I scratched his head like I did when we first met. It brought back a lot memories of how we used to be so maybe I'm too anxious and could stand to practice being calm.
As always thanks for your support and blunt responses. I'm a little slow to learn but after hitting my head against the wall with zero results I realize what it will take on my part for us to reconcile. Constantly calling, texting, and emailing is NOT the answer...! I GET IT NOW, I PROMISE.
I must say that I'm so happy at the progress thus far. There was once upon a time where he would NOT speak to me, return my calls, let alone meet with me so I now have some hope.
One thing he did say that I took careful NOTE of during our lunch was that, he was NOT sure if I was being genuine in the past OR if I had an angle??? He says that's the reason he reacted to me with inconsistencies and doubts. I know now that if I want this marriage that I must be honest and willing to do the work with no strings attached!
