The nastier she is the more upset she is... She wants out of the pain dude, you CAN offer her seomthing better... She just wont listen... And yes, you made some mistakes...
Don't be around friday, I really don't like HER calling the meetings, it just induces panic... counteroffer for a later time... Taking meetings she calls just gives her too much confidence.
I am not suggesting she will admit to being played, but five years down the road or ten she will remember you tried to protect her and she will understand .... married to you or not she WILL get it... I just hope it isn't after you have moved on...