IB...I am totally in favor of protecting yourself and your children...I obtained a LS to protect me from his financial demise...and good thing because he ended up 200K (yes "K") in debt before all was said and done...while he has ruined his credit my credit is still fine (btw, I maintain my LS until he settles all his debts for the protection of me and my children)...as for child support H said he would pay me and I included it in the LS court order...again this proved to be a protection because now with creditors I can "garnish" 1/2 of his wages for CS to protect me and the creditors just have to wait until he files BK...
when he was "gone" I didn't force the CS issue because I knew he didn't have the money and I didn't see making things worse for him and ultimately us because it would have just reinforced in him that he was right about me...
I did invite him over at times to be with son...rarely did he come...when things started coming around I would ask him out with me to discuss family matters...and eventually it led to discussing us...because by this point I had a pending D...we decided to postpone it and I think we hold the record for our county for the number of postponements...it was postponed for over 2 years!
I didn't do things to make things harder for him...but I did expect and he did agree to support the children...I ended up doing it myself because he fell so deep in a hole and was living off of credit cards...I continued to file jointly with because at the time it benefited me financially...however, in the long run this proved to be a mistake because there were some business ventures that he was involved in that ended up being owed down the line to the IRS...he didn't know what he was doing and thought the business was taking care of the taxes for him!!!
Anyway...I had to let him go...let him fall...let him figure things out...when he did come home he was a mess...he needed medical and emotional help...but I was tough even then...he had developed an alcohol problem and would lie about it...when he got sloshing drunk and couldn't stand up I called 911 to take him to the hospital...I did have to do this twice but he did accept treatment and has been sober now for about 2 1/2 years... I didn't give him money...but did provide him a home and food...he had to do the rest of the work...he works now almost full time but makes far less then I do...a change from the way things were before...I also carry the benefits...another change...it is hard for me but worth it to have my family in tact and happy...and I can say that I am happy too so it is all good...
So bottom line, protect your children and you legally and financially...after that what you want or don't want to do is entirely your decision...
