There are two camps on infidleity : Hardball and Softball... Most experts in infidelity that I have read are in hardball and treat infidelity as an addiction... Your WIfe's is just starting up so its not that bad yet... but if you play hardball here you run the risk of it going into full on sexual affair wtih all the sleazy details that go with it.
I was in your situation 3.5 years ago.. I learned only two weeks in when it had jsut started as an EA.. I decided to go softball... THREE YEARS later after a sleazy sexual affair had run its coruse and OM tossed her away I had a mess to clean up with her...
You will find MANY PEOPLE on this forum who went softball initially because they were AFRAID that going hardball would drive their spouse away.
In my experience and research going softball and keeping the affair a secret ALLOWS the AFFAIR to THRIVE
If your FT is NOT experienced with infidleity then why woudl you take their advice?
Their focus is on the damage it does AFTER she's ended it... I am telling you if you DON'T press her to end it exposure is the LEAST o the damage worries you will have to deal with...
Can you fight for your marriage wile your wife is mounting OM in some cheap hotel someplace and laughing at you when you see him on the street?
That's the direction this is headed if you don't find those raisins your wife's hid away in the bedroom closet and put them back in your pants where they belong.
You have been warned. I disagree with the FT, as to many experts in infidelity... Keeping it a secret is EXACTLY what THEY WANT you TO DO
