unfortunately, mine will occure in the service drive thru at a car dealership in a tomn of maybe 15,000 people.
Not as much impact or drama.
But i am going to work on the "manipulative, predator" angle. She's not innocent but he's taking advantage of it.
Billabong wearing, sideways hat loser. He either shares the co-op housing with his sister or still lives in another little town-possibly with his dad/parents.
unfortunately, mine will occure in the service drive thru at a car dealership in a tomn of maybe 15,000 people.
Not as much impact or drama.
But i am going to work on the "manipulative, predator" angle. She's not innocent but he's taking advantage of it.
Billabong wearing, sideways hat loser. He either shares the co-op housing with his sister or still lives in another little town-possibly with his dad/parents.
CD: I hope this fact (that he's such a loser) gives you COMPLETE confidence in yourself and what you need to do for YOU!
Let's face it: It takes a real loser (with a lot of issues themselves) to run around with a married person!
But heck... the woman (and I use that term loosely) that my H was texting was a complete skank and not in a good way! It's like when people look at ole Jesse and think, "He cheated on Sandra Bullock with THAT?!!!!" The spouse is usually the much better option but who knows why on earth the WAS looks to a loser instead of their spouse! I mean, even Halle Berry was cheated on... go figure.
The spouse looks to the goofball in the cap because ther'es no history of damage there.. in her mind that makes him ideal... She's tryign to escape history so she goes someplace where there isn't a painful history... OR goes to an old boyfriend with a short history that she can idolize because she doen'st remember half the immature crap he did back then
Unfortunately, I know why she went elsewhere. She and I had become so preoccupied with everything else going on in our lives (and I do believe her negtivism towards me starting mid-pregnancy) that we didn't make tame to be together and keep the emotional and physical connection alive.
I hate myself for not realizing it sooner and if given the chance I KNOW we could make a silk ourse out of this. But, generally, once the woman is emotionally "done", it's pretty much DONE.
I've seen it and suffered this before. In fact, my description was "they break up with you months before but don't actually tell you until they have set up their next adventure. Then the guy is scrambling to play catch up and deal with all the emotion at once." that's why almost every guy here uses the word "blindsided"
The only good thing I have so far is I now know what it is and won't let it happen again-regardless of whether it is W or not.
Carefull, Allen. When I met my W I was in vehicle sales. Specialty/Fleet but the occasional used car
I may call the father and/or mother, too. Don't know them but they should know what their son (and other son and DIL) are enabling by hiding them at their place.
CD, she went elsewhere because she CHOSE to ESCAPE the problems of the marriage rather than dealing with them.
You are correct women plan exit strategies and build walls, men do as well, but I would argue less so. However, all that emotional work and wall-buidling COULD have been put into repair instead... Your wife chose to build a wall between you rather than a bridge... She CHOSE to do this ALL IN SECRET
This is NOT the mature route to a healthy life...
And I didn't even MENTION the sleazeball yet...
DOn't blame yourself. You BOTH own the problems in the marriage 50-50, but her choice to plan an exit strategy rather than a bridge to repair the marriage SHE OWNS FULLY
Don't beat yourself up about the affair... It belongs to her and the dirt bag... Not you
