I think the best advice right now is to get to IC and joint C'ing ASAP. Make the appts tomorrow. I do not feel without a 3rd party you and your W will be able to do this on your own.
KEEP GAL'ig! Do not stop that! You don't have to ask your W everywhere nor do you have to accept every invite she offers you.
In your mind (or somewhere private) start making a list of what you need to work on, what you would like your W to work on and what a good marriage looks like to you. IMO "better communication" is simply way too vague.
