WH writes to me today that if baby doesn't have his surname it will endanger her future "inner balance". No, that happened when you decided to walk out on her, d!ickhead.
He also writes "I am her father and I am going to be part of her life as her father". How, at 17,000kms is he going to do that?
The devil in me says to use YOUR maiden just to tick him off! As for his "being a father" - you mean like when he went away for two weeks and didn't bother to call or email to check on her - THAT kind of father? Because being a father and a being an MIA sperm donor (to quote NewMama) are two VERY different things.
Hmm. Wonder what he'd do if you called him that?
(Ooh, this guy really ticks me off! I think he needs some alone time with 3 or 4 of the women on this forum to uh...set him straight!)
Originally Posted By: Piano
I feel like I am dealing with a nutcase.
I really have never seen this side of my WH before. He is unrecognisable. Separation/divorce really does bring out the worst in people.
Yes, it does. Add a MLC, OW, and a newborn, and you've got the makings of a REAL mess (not to mention a Lifetime movie of the week!)
Originally Posted By: Piano
I will try to be strong at tomorrow's visit and be present. My Dad is going to stick around too (for my sake).
Girl, you're ALREADY stronger than most of the women I've ever met! I CANNOT imagine being in your shoes, and you're handling it with so much grace and dignity.
I think it's a very good idea to have your dad along for moral support, given your WH's sudden unpredictability.
Originally Posted By: Piano
My H keeps saying we have "years" to talk about what happened between us. That's another way of saying we won't ever talk about it/process it.
Years to talk about it? When? While he's "being a father" to your baby in a different hemisphere?
Hmm. A better option: talk about it now, see if you can find a resolution, and if not, then have closure so you and baby grand can move on.
He's trying to cakewalk and leave his options open. He thinks he can move away, have this fling, then come back when he's all done.
I think you need to shake him up a bit. Know any guys (preferably cute and single) who can come over and help you fix stuff or help with the baby?
I ask, because AntoniaB over the infidelity forum said after her husband moved out to live with OW, she had a couple of different married guys from work come over to help with handyman stuff around the house. When her husband found out about it, he got upset, emailed the two guys who had helped, and asked them out for beers so they could "talk." Translation: he didn't want them around his wife and was trying to mark his territory. Both guys told Antonia and she told them to ignore the email. That shook her WH to the core. Hysterical!
Maybe your "player piano" could stand a little competition...just a thought.
