I think what we try so hard to put out of our minds during the day comes back to visit us at night. We try to control those thoughts when we're awake and they will not be denied during sleep.
For months after the bomb I was running on between 3 and 4 hours of sleep a night. I'd go to sleep without assistance, then snap awake after a few hours. There was no going back to sleep as I couldn't stop my mind from thinking. My sleep pattern is a lot more normal now, although now and then I'll wake after a few hours and not go back to sleep.
I didn't have a lot of dreams about my H, but when I did they were vivid. I don't dream much of him now.
I didn't hear him so to speak, but maybe that's because I still have sons in the house who sound like and have a lot of H's mannerisms. Sometimes I still think it's H walking into the house.
The more used to the situation I got I found I was more able to deal with the sitch instead of just reacting to it. I was able to process things and clear things up and start putting them into perspective.
I'm trying to approach each day being the best I can be. Some days I do better than others, but the effort is there.
Punkin, the way I figure it is if our H's don't return, it's their loss. We're going to be just fine! (I wrote something for you on my thread.)
