I don't know exactly what they talk about at work, but I know that their behavior this week (not talking except in meetings, not going to lunch together) already has people at work talking. He complained to me last night that a woman at work kept asking "are you and OW in a fight? Why are you ignoring each other?" They have been inseparable at work for the past 7 years so this is definitely not normal behavior for them.
And yes, I firmly believe that the entire push for divorce was because he thought they would come out the other side together forever. That he really didn't ever see himself as someone who would have an affair, but if they ended up married and happily ever after then the affair would have been justified. Now it's not looking like that is going to happen and I think the full realization of his horrible behavior is starting to hit home. She had already filed a few months ago and I'm sure she was egging him on to divorce me as well.
And yes, I've read DR cover to cover several times. I have been DBing since early May. My numerous changes have been acknowledged several times in couples counseling, but I believe that because of the affair my changes didn't have much hope of convincing him to stay.
So I keep talking with him about the affair or just talking in general? Do I initiate friendly touches on the arm etc. or hold back on all that for now? It has only been slightly over a week since I exposed the affair.
