CD you have to assess that on a case by case basis.
I only reccomend exposure to parties that may apply some pressure to end the affair.
This may involve OM and OM family if that will embarass OM...
THe idea is take the EXCITEMENT and SECRECY OUT of the affair and exchange that for STRESS and SCANDAL instead... The safety of the publically respectable marriage and family looks a lot more attractive than being part of a stressful scandal.
Many spouses will ENABLE the addiction by keeping the affair secret.. WOrried that the WS will be LESS attracted to you for getting family involved...
I say nonsense... No alcoholic likes having somone lock the liquior cabinet on them and exposing their bad habits to family in the hopes it will help end it.
And Pupper is right on the ball there... If this IS an addiction.. I won't end on its own.. Your wife will bottom out or be pressured to end it by you and family.
Very few affair couples who run off with each other make it long term.. the affair can't survive in reality... Both affair members are immature for having the affair and it takes maturity to make a LONG TERM relationship work... you can't survive with out that...
Most affair couples fall apart before they manage to grow up... but that can take YEARS to run its course... I reccomend attacking it directly instead of waiting that out...
SeeingRed has been waiting over three years... using softball approaches.. the affiar is JUST NOW showing signs of wavering... I don't know many on this forum who have the stomach to fight for three years...
