I did read your other post - and I am so grateful. I keep re-reading the stages of MLC and LBS / trying to remind myself that the feelings I am having are to be expected for the circumstances. It helps me to remember to maintain a compassionate and respectful heart. That is how I want to be remembered.
It's a quiet Friday night and there are more moments lately that I am embracing the peace. I am more willing to admit how emotionally exhausted I truly am. Also,reflecting on the MLC stages - I'm not sure if my H is in replay, depression, or withdrawal - he shows signs of each phase. But what I am sure of is that I have been fighting a silent or invisible enemy for several years now and it has taken its toll on me. My resilience and strength is seriously reduced. I know that I am not a total doormat - but I have lost any boundaries I might have tried to have in place for myself. I desperately need to find myself and determine how I will respond to this challenge. I want my kids to be proud of me and I want to be proud of myself when there is resolution.
Thanks again for your support.
M-48/XH-48 M=25/T=28 years Ds-24,22/S-18 D - 3/11 A Day at a Time
