Just found out she already filed

[antlers]

I still second guess myself one because the D is not finalized and I don't know why but I feel like I shouldn't piss her off. Two, because me pushing her away I'm sending her straight into someone else's arms (ok I said it). I think the truth of the matter is that she'll do what she wants to do regardless of what I say or do. It's what happened during our last separation.

Don't concern yourself whether or not you're pissing her off. She's ripping apart your marriage and your family. She's convinced herself that what she's doing is OK. Take care of yourself, legally and financially, and don't worry about the effect it has on her. You have every right to protect yourself legally and financially, as much as possible...and come out of this thing as well as you possibly can, legally and financially. It's her doing...so don't concern yourself with the effect it has on you. She sure isn't concerned with the effect her actions are having on you, your kids, the family, and the marriage!

If she goes into someone else's arms...it isn't because of anything you've done! It won't be because you 'pushed' her there! That's an excuse that some cheaters use...that's a copout! "The truth of the matter is that she'll do what she wants to do regardless of what I say or do." That's the fact Jack! Hard consequences are the only thing she'll understand...maybe. She's made her choices, and you have to make yours...and yours need to benefit you, and your kids, without any concern of the effect it'll have on her!