It's just that I've RARELY (ever??) seen no-contact & transparency put into place incrementally, or even later. It's best done at the moment of maximum remorse and awareness for the cheating spouse, and it's best for the betrayed spouse to stay COOL and take things VERRRY SLOWWWLY until those imperative pieces are in place.
I would be shocked if your wife WEREN'T shocked when you now try to implement no-contact/transparency. In her mind, I'm betting that those things are "settled" now.
I could be wrong; there are always exceptions. But I just think you should circle back TODAY, with a loving, "Hey, before things get too far out of hand, I think it's important to ...." conversation with her.
