New here, not sure where to start

[Jack_Three_Beans]

WHEN you ignore the advice (statiscally speaking you're going to) about not talking about your marriage below are the examples of guilt you have verbally used.

You might not mean it, or even see it. But just reading it and attempting to put myself in his shoes, I could feel it.

Add to that the physical, the look on your face when your sad about the way things currently are, its in one of your earlier posts.

You said not to give up on you...that doesn't mean coddle by the way. My concern is for YOU not him. You, and then your marriage.

I asked why..because he's afraid girlfriend might call or text while I was playing?

Later I told him that I thought it was sad that his wife couldn't play a game on his phone because he was worried his GF might call. I asked him "what's wrong with this picture?"

I said that he is hurting me tho, by continuing to have a relationship with her.

I also told him he was my favorite person in the whole world.

Just a few examples.

The last one? The favorite person one...doesn't seem like it. Have your read either Divorce Busting or Remedy book yet?

Come across the part where Michele says NOT to say "I love you." yet?

It is like that you don't say it, because you remind them that they (currently) don't.

The theory that you do not talk about your marriage is that the LBS doesn't have the knowledge to avoid traps, pitfalls, emotions...the expectations that they can do this again soon. Lots of different reasons.

Usually the LBSer asks questions where they HOPE for a certain type of answer...and things go to hell in a handbasket quickly when those answers aren't the ones they hear.

Usually the LBSer turns all clingy and crying, or screaming and upset.

It affects the calm of the LBSer...and it is a place of landmines and snipers. Not a good place for most until the LBSer gets more of a sense of self again.