"People" don't feel it's ok to attack your character. THOSE people did. Don't define everyone else by the actions of a few.
i just realize what can sum up how i really feel about these accusations. it's as if they see a "kick me" sign taped to my back.
i allowed these things to define me.
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Get a better response from whom?
it's not really about getting a response from someone specific. it's kinda like when i get confrontational or i dig at my h, he ends up closing up or stonewalling. i get frustrated because we're not communicating .. blah blah ..
in other words, try a different way of looking at things or to approach the issue. it might improve communication and doesn't provoke such a defensive response from the person i am talking to.
i took the childish route of .. if you hurt me, i'm gonna hurt you too. and what does that solve? nothing. i'm almost embarrassed to say that i use the same tactic when i speak to my father. and i get disrespectful and condescending. why? again .. that "you hurt me so i'm gonna hurt you" mentality.
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One of the things I notice in what you write is that many times your actions/words/plans come with a sort of string attached to them. "If I do this, what will it get me" or "I did thus and so, and it didn't get me anywhere with that person."
i think what you are trying to say is what coach has said to me before in a different post .. focus on the process and not the outcome. i think my process lead me down dead end roads in the past.
