Are you on any anti-depressants? I am on the generic form of Paxil and it made a world of difference for me. I got a few Chlorazepate to help me until the Paroxetine took effect. I was extremely distraught over the loss of my W and family and it caused me to be very desperate and very needy. Both turn-offs. I had to go to my Dr 3 times over 4 months before he would prescribe them for me. Things improved dramatically after that. I can't help but think that if he had given them to me sooner, things may be different now because maybe I would have been able to back off a bit.
ADs helped me a LOT in my sitch. My doc prescribed both an instant one for an anxiety attack (fortunately, I only had to use these 2-3 times), and a longer term one that "evened me out," and REALLY helped me get into "game mode."
I was able to get off them last year, but I'd recommend them to ANYONE going thru this hell.
I actually tried some AD's and I just felt numb and medicated. I decided that it probably wasn't best for me. I've never had any signs of depression up until this all started. Lost weight, motivation, etc....
I'm feeling much better then I did but still not 100%. I'm sure that comes in time.
Anyway, the W is really harping on me about the refi. She needs to sign her lease agreement to get her rental for the year. I wish I had info for her but nothing yet. She is telling me to be more agressive and proactive.
Smile and wave, that's my new moto....
M: 36 W: 29 S: 2.5 EA: 2/2010 OM1 D Bomb: 3/2010 PA: 6/2010 OM2 W moved out 8/2010 Loc: DE, USA
Anyway, the W is really harping on me about the refi. She needs to sign her lease agreement to get her rental for the year. I wish I had info for her but nothing yet. She is telling me to be more agressive and proactive.
Smile and wave, that's my new moto....
FFH, This is NOT your problem. Communicate to her that finding HER place to live is her deal - not yours. You are working on YOUR LIVING SPACE - not hers. This is DIVORCE...where she deals with her issues by herself (BGP) and you deal with your issues by yourself. You no longer...work for her. She needs to step off.
Greek
Me45 H46 T25 M22 S21 & 19 D13 Separated and filed 8/08 Moved home 11/08
I just responded to her email. I did mention that the house is what i'm working on and she can move once her financial obligation to the house is completed.
I'm sure she's ready to get her own place so her and OM don't have to sneak around. I just hope she's cognizant of our son while she enjoys her freedom.
M: 36 W: 29 S: 2.5 EA: 2/2010 OM1 D Bomb: 3/2010 PA: 6/2010 OM2 W moved out 8/2010 Loc: DE, USA
Why does she have to wait until you straighten out the house situation to move?
Why are you already worried about her and OM and how she conducts herself? She's going to do what she is going to do when she is gone, and it reflects on her, and she has to live with the consequences.
How you conduct yourself reflects on you, so worry about what kind of role model you are for your son.
You want your son to see you be emotionally and mentally strong, lovingly detached, non-controlling, non vindictive, not bitter or angry, and optimistic, right?
Life is going to be good.
Last edited by TimeHeals; 07/08/1004:55 PM.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
I had a busy day this morning. Took son to swim lessons, and then to his check up at the doctors... This morning W went to work she had a bunch of clothes with her so I can only assume she's not coming home.
I don't know why I still worry about her or even care where she is at night. I never ask anymore but I battle with the thoughts in my head. It's hard to get past the fact that she could potentially be having a PA with OM. Something I need to get past.
Trying to stay busy today, my son is napping now so I have some free time to let my mind wander..... Maybe I'll go lay by the pool for a bit...
M: 36 W: 29 S: 2.5 EA: 2/2010 OM1 D Bomb: 3/2010 PA: 6/2010 OM2 W moved out 8/2010 Loc: DE, USA
What is up FFH? Hopefully things are going well and you are too busy with the kids to have time to be on these boards for a while. I need to get to that point for myself.
Home appraiser came by yesterday. He sounded optimistic about the value I need to complete transaction. I should know something early this week and hopefully close on house at the end of month.
W went to look at her rental with MIL. She seemed a happy about location, it's close to me so that will help out with son. I went out with a friend lastnight, got home late but it was nice getting out.
I'm looking forward to the separation with W, only because there is so much tension in the home right now.
M: 36 W: 29 S: 2.5 EA: 2/2010 OM1 D Bomb: 3/2010 PA: 6/2010 OM2 W moved out 8/2010 Loc: DE, USA
