What had to be said? Did you validate what he said or did you just go Ice Princess on him? You were passive-aggressive to him and his parents, have you done your work on that?
that he didn't think i would make a good mother. i don't know how to validate that. "you're right, i wouldn't make a good mother"? i was thinking "where do you come off being an expert on judging my ability to handle motherhood?" but i didn't say that either.
i think i have. i showed a lot of restraint when his mother insulted me and cut me down in my own home. most would have killed her, but comments rolled off like water on a ducks back.
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And you said no because???????
i didn't say no. i said ok. i'll talk to the ic about it. and i did. i worked on that part of me. discovered some interesting things. it wasn't as simple as not having that emotional connection. it was things my father had said to me in the past. my father once called me a whore when i went on my first date. that comment stuck to me my entire life. i was afraid to date. afraid to enjoy intimacy. because enjoying intimacy meant i was a whore. that my father was right about me. and it held me back. i could never enjoy sex because of this nagging comment in the back of my head.
after working with the ic, i now know that it's ok to enjoy it.
