But she sees me contacting the OM, as well as not wanting to sell the house, as a "backslide" into my "old" self.
She says "All you are thinking of is YOURSELF. You are NEVER going to change".
Man she was happy this morning too. It was sickening to watch. I'm going to call her mom soon and let her know.
I am also going to post a message for EVERYONE to see on my Facebook. I think the whole world should know what a dirtbag this guy is.
This is going to be worse than last time. Now, she has a DEFINITE time frame in the near future that she has planned to see him. She is so looking forward to it to live out all her sexual fantasies with him. If I TRY and break that up, then I might just push her to do it tomorrow.
He doesn't seem like the type of guy that will back down NOW. This has become a battle of wills. And her and him together are so stubborn and hot for each other than I don't know if I can win.
Me - 32 Her -30 Married - 7 Years Together - 9 Years No Kids 05/21 - Bomb 6/8 - Exposed 7/9 - Re-Exposed 06/11 - She Filed
It's nearly impossible to combat infidleity AND maintain her LIKING you QS.. The person that locks the liquor cabinet on the alcoholic is ALWAYS the bad guy who is "way too controlling" etc... It's a position you can't win...
You just have to say something like "Everything I am doing I am doing out of respect for you and our marriage.. I will NOT allow some creep to violate our marriage and I will do EVERYTHIGN I CAN to ensure we maintain civil respect for one another.. I DO NOT DESERVE to be disrespected in this way... we were married for TEN YEARS and even in divorce civilized RESPECT is IMPORTANT... I will NOT allow him to disrespect our ten years together"
The key thing is, you KNOW this guy's a dirt bag... what kind of creep presses someone in secret for sex like this when she's clearly angry with YOU and living with YOU?
If she WANTED to live else where she WOULD wouldn't she? Seriously...
Is this guy showing any sympathy for the divorce or her pain or anythign at all or is he just focussing on sex?
Dirtbag... Been there man... My wife got hooked up with a dirt bag who used her sexually for a LONG time before my wife came to her senses...
But I dind't have anyone pressing me to expose... And He wasn't in the military so I didn't have many to expose to on his end at all... He was a jeuvenlile creep who should have been in jail for what he did.. I think all creeps like this should be arrested.. its criminal to exploit women like this in my opinion
I would expose him... When your wife confronts you about it if she does you just tell her you will not tolerate disrespect from her in your own home VERY CALMNLY
Tell her she is free to leave any time... But this is your home and you will not accept disrespect from her while she lives there... IF she confronts you on exposing this creep... Last time you THREATENED to expose him he just shut her out... I say you just expose this guy NOW
I agree!!! This is bullcrap. No man should have to put up with this blatant disrespect IN HIS OWN HOME!
This isn't about controlling her QS, its about your dignity here... you gave her ten years and she has NO RIGHT to VIOLATE that memory like this... There is a RIGHT way and a WRONG way to exit a marriage... and this is NOT the way you want to remember each other if this leads to divorce...
And this CREEP KNOWS better... jesus.. He's in the military he's supposed to PROTECT people not violate their homes in secret.. what a dirtbag
Screw the Facebook -- that's petty, immature stuff. Expose to his CO instead.
Look, she's going to be PISSED either way. Better to take the higher, more mature road, and be able to say "Everything I'm doing, I'm doing to fight for our marriage."
Would you be able to accept a divorce from your wife if she handled it with DIGNITY and CIVLILITY and RESPECT?
If that's the case, then you aren't trying to control HER or the marriage as much as you are just fighting for your dignity here...
SHe can complain all she wants, but ultimately she has to say something like :
"OK, I do choose to divorce here, but I haven't been honest, I have been disrespectful and cruel to you. I will pursue divorce, but you will have all my respect and consideration through this. I want to RESPECT our TEN YEARS together and leave our marriage with a good memory... I don't want to DEFILE it the way I am donig"
Would you accept that from her?
If you can honestly accept THAT, then this is about you fighting for THAT, not the marriage, and you certainly shouldn't have to leave your home because SHE can't manage her pain safely...
She IS in pain, I don't doubt that, but there's a respectable way to manage pain and disrespectful... She clearly cares little whom she hurts as long as it is an escape from her pain...
This is about your respect QS, you gave her ten years and you deserve better... if she DID that she would PROBABLY even reconsider the divorce entirely... she's just on the wrong damn road... And her parents are USELESS here... useless enablers... educate them if you can man
This is kinda like sports players and the sore loser bad winnner synromes they get into...
There's a right way and a wrong way to accept a win There's a right way and a wrong way to accept a loss
There's a right way and a wrong way to accept a problematic marriage There's a right way and a wrong way to accept a problematic marriage
She's acting like the bitter winner or loser here.. throwing fits and name calling and all of the crap bad winners and bad losers do in sports games...
Really terrible stuff... her parents should be ashamed they raised someone like that...
Really childish... I know ten year olds who can accept success and defeat with more grace and dignity than she is showing right now
Screw the Facebook -- that's petty, immature stuff. Expose to his CO instead.
Look, she's going to be PISSED either way. Better to take the higher, more mature road, and be able to say "Everything I'm doing, I'm doing to fight for our marriage."
Puppy
Expose to CO definitely.. But I would put it up on facebook later, I would NOT HIDE her dirty little secrets from anyone at this point... She really does need to grow up...
The more you fight for dignity QS the more childish she seems to get... SHe's just losing respect from everyone at that point
