Quote:
It seems that the original discussion of his listening style somehow got twisted to her listening style. Or lack thereof.


That wasn't the original point. Sox jumped in with that one on her own because that is what she feels is going on in HER life, so she is projecting it onto IDU.

Speaking of communication problems....

Quote:
It sounds to me like he accepts that some of her complaints (lack of help, etc.) are legit pre-affair complaints.


Yes, he does. I don't, however, see how that brings up the issue of communication between him and his wife who happens to be having an affair while she is married to him and living under the same roof as him.

Quote:
face of the criticism and the harsh words and the whoop-de-doo and the passing days and weeks and months that seeps in and says, "Maybe it is legit".


And she still won't care so long as she is carrying on with another man. In fact, she doesn't even respect him while she is doing that, and that's HER problem. She should have had the character and decency not to have an affair while she was married, but she did not, so she is strung out on the drama and infatuation of this affair and treating her husband very badly.

Quote:
She's NOT doing her part right now; there is no argument there. The A has to stop. That is the Y factor but in no way discounts the Y factor, which Sox was offering some perspective on and you seemingly dismissed and rather rudely, at that.


While she's having an affair he could turn into Einstein in Charles Atlas' body with the soul of Ghandi, and it won't matter.

His 180s are something he has to do for himself. One of the 180s is going to have to be standing up for what is right and what is good.

Is is right or good to lie and cheat?

I'm trying to imagine that in his wedding vows:

"Do you, IDU, take this woman who will lie and cheat and treat you with contempt"?

Last edited by TimeHeals; 07/08/10 12:46 AM.

M-47,W-40,No kids
D-filed 5/27/2010
Piecing - 10/21/2010
-=Soon to be banned=-