Quote:
She tried to talk and assumed he wasn't listening. That has nothing to do with an affair


Maybe you should talk to a family therapist trained in infidelity before you come her pontificating.

It HAS everything to do with the affair.

Now, complaints before the affair are one thing, but afterward forget it. Might as well be trying to have a discussion with the Mad Hatter.


If one person is living in a fantasy imagining life with and missing their "soul mate", the other person might as well be Charlie Brown's teacher if that's not the subject they want to discuss: how wonderful this fantasy is.

It's sad, and until you've lived it or seen it close up, you might want to second guess yourself here.

For example, can you imagine your husband breaking down and crying, so you ask him what is wrong and pull him into your arms to console him, and then ... <sound of trains going off the rails>... he tells you the woman he has been talking to who he is literally obsessed with and he had an argument, and he's desperate to win her back?

How you going to "communicate" about that?

You're not talking to some guy (IDU) who hasn't tried to save his marriage, who hasn't read all about love languages and communication, and who hasn't been willing to go to MC if and when the affair ends.

Last edited by TimeHeals; 07/07/10 11:06 PM.
M-47,W-40,No kids
D-filed 5/27/2010
Piecing - 10/21/2010
-=Soon to be banned=-