Just Confronted - A Litttle Confused

[Quicksilver264]

Well I think I am at a crossroads right now. She was looking up hotels last night near where that Facebook guy lives. He still hasn't contacted her back, but I think that may only be a technical issue (busy) and not a true desire to stay aay from her. She calls and texts him frequently, almost like she is pursuing him desperately.

I know I am not supposed to pursue. I also know that if she ends up going and seeing him, that it is going to become a physical affair.

She is hyper paranoid about me spying on her. She deletes all her text messages, even from her parents. I also am pretty sure that her mom tells my wife some of what I talk to her about.

We have a FC session tonight, and I am completely unsure of what to discuss, or what to say. In FC sessions, is the LBS allowed or supposed to say what they are REALLY feeling, as in I want this marriage to work? I had an idea of something to say"

"There's nothing anyone can do to change your mind. And that is fine. But I just can't be with someone who doesn't love me, who pursues and cheats with other men, and takes great pleasure in the whole divorce process. We all make our own choices, and you have made yours. There's nothing more I'd love than to stay married, just not to someone who acts like you do."

I kind of want to re-re-expose to her mom, but I am totally unsure of whether or not she will tell my wife. That might blow open my entire intel operation. This is a situation that I'm damned either way. If I don't do it, all it is going to take is for her to drive down there, get a hotel, and then call him and tell him shes 6 miles away waiting for him to come over. She is that determined.

If I do expose again, then in another 3-4 weeks she will just keep at it because last time it worked, and I will have no way of knowing where and when she will do it.

She found out that I had not been served yet, but the paperwork has been filed. She even marked the end of the 90 days on her calendar, and told a girlfriend that she wants to "celebrate" together.

@Puppy:

Do you have a guide or journal of what you did? You had your MIL on your side? What finally made your wife re-think her decision.