I just really admire the heck out of you for being SO strong during all of this! Glad you have your family nearby. For some reason I had it in my head that he took you to Australia, got you pregnant, then abandonned you on the other other side of the planet as a stranger in a strange country. Glad he wasn't THAT harsh! (Though I'm still ready to relieve him of his man parts for being such a jerk to you!)
I'm still waffling about the picture updates. I can see both sides of the issue:
1. If he doesn't bother to ask about her, he doesn't deserve to know her. 2. Out of sight, out of mind, easier to be completely self-absorbed.
Hmm. Call me vindictive, but I still think I'd send occasional updates showing what mildstones he's missing, like first month, three months, first tooth, first Halloween, first Christmas, first Easter, first year (if he's still out of the picture all that time). Then I'd go dark and not send anything again until he asked.
Controlling? Perhaps. But he DID create a baby, and he needs to be reminded of that. He needs to feel guilty for what he's done to both of you - and that's not just the Catholic school girl in me talking. Walking away from a pregnant wife in unconscionable. Abandonning his innocent child? Lower than low. Men have done jail time for less.
I wouldn't make it so easy for him to walk away from his actions. He may be a horrible father, but a few digs here and there might make him stop and think about how much he's hurt you. Then going dark may make him think he's being replaced.
Let's hope it doesn't come to that. Maybe when he sees her in the next few days, he'll realize just how much he missed both of you and give him second thoughts about running away...
