My Wife is Having an Affair with Co-Worker

[LSG]

I can't believe the hurt and pain that my kids are feeling everyday. S is misbehaving and D argues with W. It is so tragic for them. S asked if I was going to be homeless and where would he find me. He is really worried about everything. I told him everything will be okay, but I truly am not sure that it will be at least for me. W seems so certain that I will lose, and she has told me that I will be homeless. She could possibly win. She has said in front of the kids that I would be homeless and with nothing if she has anything to do with it.

Right now she has all the money, her parents vast fortune, and she could out spend me 100:1 if she thinks she is losing. This is a trying for me to keep strong and positive for my kids. It is my kids that keeps me fighting against the odds that are against me.

I am so worried more by the day about my two wonderful children that I have.

I put on my resume that I work for my parents, and an approximate amount I would earn on there too. My parents only give a little money to me from time to time. W brought up if this is being taxed and do I report this to the IRS. She is going to go after my parents apparently too. She only lived there with me and our D for a year, and my parents paid everything. That is gratitude for you. What a real piece of work my STBXW is. I am disgusted by her.

I am very tired lately, and the headaches are here everyday.

I will continue to fight to find the strength to go on.

[LSG]

I just noticed that W changed our marital status on FB. However she still wears her wedding ring. I am feeling more and more that our the D will happen, and there is no chance to save the M.

Please respond Allen and everyone. I wonder what I can do between now and the August 15th hearing.

[LSG]

Why is part of me wanting to beg, plead, and do all the wrong things to save my marriage tonight? I just don't know where these emotions are coming from. What is evoking them lately?

I know I should not do this.

[Allen A]

http://24.141.78.27/protection.pdf

[LSG]

W was off for a week, and I think that communication was minimal with OM, and we were actually communicating some, but now that she is back to work, it seems that everything is back to the way it was before. It is so strange. I see all the signs of the A back again. It was better the longer W was away from the OM and work.

[LSG]

Ever since W is back at work, it seems that she is growing more distant. There was a glimmer of her the day before she went back. I even had a little hope for the M. That has faded quickly. I do not feel the hopelessness of the time before last week.

She did ask on Saturday night why I was bringing up things, and I told her I did not know. I do know that I needed to say my peace and set the record straight. I believe that a lot of the ideas about me did have an impact in the argument. She has thought about her whole part in our sitch. It does not change anything, but I do feel that I needed to say what I said and stick up for myself which I did not do enough of.

[Allen A]

Your wife associates OM and her affair with her workplace dude... When she's not at work, the thoughts aren't there...

THis is an ADDICTION, and just like any other it has triggers that drive it... her workplace is one of them... No work, No addiction is triggered... It is there in her head still, but doens't have the drive it does when she's at her workplace... HE works there... She IS going to think of him when she's going there...

This is basic arithmetic

[SunnyD]

LSG: sorry that things are so down for you right now. It sounds like you are pretty depressed. Not that I blame you, as it's hard in this situation to not be. You need to take care of yourself first and foremost. Are you exercising every day? Eating healthy? What practical steps are you taking to GAL (Get a Life) and 180s? If you haven't read DB or DR you may not fully get those concepts, but you need to! Is there a library where you can go and see if they have some of the books discussed here since you can't purchase them? You truly need something to help find your inner strength. Without it, it's hard to find the motivation to tuning back into a strong, confident person who knows they deserve more than this! You obviously do - but you need to believe that for yourself!

[LSG]

Allen,

Is there anything I can do about it?

[LSG]

SunnyD,

Actually I am pretty up at the moment. I do have my down times. I have felt better since getting a lot of things of my mind the other night. It feels good to let it out sometimes.

I am taking care of myself these day much better. The library does not have any of the books that have been recommended here. I just try to understand what I can from the forums. I probably make mistakes that way, but I know it has helped me personally being here.

I do believe that I am growing each day, but SunnyD you are right I need to do more.

Thanks for the ideas to continue to gain inner strength.