I can speak from personal experience that it results in anger, and makes a man wonder if he is desirable as a man to any woman. I honestly can understand (but not condone) why many men have affairs. I came to the point where the pain of rejection exceeded any potential hope for happiness or emotional closeness. What I wanted most was of no further iterest to me.
While I needed sex, I also needed to be touched and to be felt like I was worth being loved. But most of all I wanted to avoid the pain of rejection, emotional humiliation and the anger that followed.
However, to me one of my turning points was Sue Johnson's book, Hold me Tight, that allowed me to realize that being touched, and being loved were things that were natural and a part of the human experience. That helped me look at myself differently. Then Glover's No More Mr Nice Guy and working on getting a life really helped me emotionally and to realize that I had to live life to make myself happy.
The book SSM and the Five Languages of love helped me figure out my situation. The book by John Gottman on the seven principals of a happy marriage helped me with some tools to work on my relationship.
Again as you said, "Sexual rejection is a lot of pain." I think that you are right in that it can cause real physical problems as well.
>43 years of marriage--My wife and I are now closer than we have been in decades. I believe that my SSM is over.
