I tried, I changed, but still am getting divorced!

[newmama]

Good point, WN. Hmmm.Now what's for lunch? lol

So I came back from S' appointment. I forgot a snack for S and they didn't have anything good at the coffee stand (last time they had bananas!) so I called stbxh to ask if he could pick up a snack or a banana on his way. (we both go to the dr. appts)He did.

I brought the cupcake,thinking maybe we could give it to S after the appointment, in the car (???) or something and sing him Happy Birthday. Stbxh said "won't that be messy?" I said yeah, but it's his birthday. He said "he could eat it at home."
So I choked up but swallowed it back and said " I was hoping we could acknowledge his birthday together!"
He said "well yeah, but could we do it at the house when I come to pick him up?" Like "of course we would!"

I didn't think of that- I forgot he was picking him up tonight!
So I said "oh, okay, sure!"

When the nurse greeted us, she asked "How was your guys' 4th?" "Do you guys have A/C for the heat wave?" I got choked up and didn't answer!!! Stbxh answered "pretty good!" "yeah..."

During the appointment there were lots of q's about his eating, sleep, play, etc. I kept saying 'he does that with me, does he do it with you?' to point out that we are divorced and to make stbxh stop answering q's with "we give him cereal, we talk to him a lot, we play ball with him" etc. He needs to say "I,"
damn it!

Well I guess I am getting choked up because he was born a year ago, and I had hope back then and was praying to God that we would be together by the time he was one. It makes sense that I am a little emotional today.

I was talking to my friend about the therapist session and told her that I hope stbxh is man enough to step in if OW got rough with S or if her daughter did. I said I didn't have reason to think she would, but I just don't know what I can say about stbxh considering his messed up emotional state....are his reasoning skills out the window?

To my surprise, my friend said "Oh, stbxh would stand up for S! He has proven to be pretty reliable and involved in his life." The same friend who normally rips him apart! I hope she is right.