Well..he says he broke it off with OW this past April, but he admits to having occasional contact with her via text, and phone calls. Just to make sure she's doing ok, of course. He says she has moved on, doesn't want anything to do with a married man and is dating other people. He is very secretive with his phone,and work computer. We had a discussion about it yesterdy and he said he didn't want me looking at them in case she happened to call or email, he says he has enough anguish in his life. I told him it was sad that his wife couldn't play Brickbreaker on his phone because he was worried his girlfriend might call. Told him it was one of those "what's wrong with this picture" scenarios. We had an incident at the grocery store yesterday. It seems like everywhere we go, he just has to gawk at other women. There was a gal in the grocery store with a nice bod, but ugly and slutty looking..he did the eye play thing with her and even followed her into the cash register line. I moved the cart to another line but he continued to stare at her across the way. I couldn't stand it, shoved his shoulder and left the store telling him that he picks the ugliest sluttiest women to sit and gawk at. When he came to the car, he denied flirting with her..saying that it was his fault that I am so paranoid about other women because of the A. And he says he looks at everyone, men and women--which is true. I explained the difference between looking and looking with purpose. It's like he needs the validation from other women to feel attractive, wanted. Even tho I tell him all the time how good he looks, what a great guy he is, etc. Obviously I'm not enough.
We are living together, after his moving out, back, out and back. We have had separate bedrooms for 10 years..we chose to have it this way..we had sleeping issues..snoring, restless leg syndrome, etc. It never hampered our sex life, just gave us both a good nights sleep.
He is very conscientious about spending..cares about his credit score. I am more of a spender than he is. We have online banking so we can see exactly what each other is spending on any given day.I haven't worked for 5 years.It was his idea for me to retire and just enjoy life. Now he says he doesn't remember saying that. What? We had many many discussions about it. Anyway, I'm looking for a job currently.
I read "A Woman's Guide to changing your man, without his knowing it" and loved it. That's how I found this place. I was looking for ideas for the 180.
I have been much better since being on the anti anxiety drugs. More calm, more even keeled, less panic and crying. I know I can make it on my own..I just don't want to. He is the love of my life and I want to work it out.
