If you can, look up some of my old posts to others right after they exposed. Maybe someone can help me with who they were (I still haven't had my second cup of coffee!), but I've gone thru DETAILED STEPS with MULTIPLE posters about what to do at this stage (not that most of them ever actually FOLLOWED it, mind you. ).
The main things are:
- segregate/firewall your finances
- seek good legal advice
- refrain from responding to text messages, phone calls, or personal confrontations from her, demanding things from you (like what you are thinking)
- continue to gather intel
- MAKE NO SIGNIFICANT MOVES. If you ARE cornered, say nothing more than "I don't want to discuss this right now. I have a lot of thinking to do."
Are your finances firewalled? Any large joint funds, or joint lines of credit, she can access?
When they are spinning, this is often the time they'll do something stupid in this regard, if they are going to.
Puppy
I will. We still have a joint account. I have to leave it open and continue paying bills thru it as court ordered.I did open my personal account and have my payroll direct diposited. There is notmuch in the joint and $300 in savings, which I am going to tell me L I must move to to my personal accountdue to the new circumstances.
I am workingon the others. There is not much I can change at the moment due to the initial court order.
Me 31 Wife 34 (Step)D 15 /(Step)S 13 / D 6 Married 3/3/01 Separated 6/4/10 Bomb 6/14/10 Served 6/22/10 EA/PA Discovered 7/5/10 Now Back Together 8/1/10
If you can, look up some of my old posts to others right after they exposed. Maybe someone can help me with who they were (I still haven't had my second cup of coffee!), but I've gone thru DETAILED STEPS with MULTIPLE posters about what to do at this stage (not that most of them ever actually FOLLOWED it, mind you. ).
The main things are:
- segregate/firewall your finances
- seek good legal advice
- refrain from responding to text messages, phone calls, or personal confrontations from her, demanding things from you (like what you are thinking)
- continue to gather intel
- MAKE NO SIGNIFICANT MOVES. If you ARE cornered, say nothing more than "I don't want to discuss this right now. I have a lot of thinking to do."
- DON'T DRINK
- eat, rest, GAL and exercise.
Puppy
Thanks I will. I'll have to re-read DR/DB as I didnt pay to much to the infidelity parts as I thoughtthey didnt include my sitch.
My thing is do I force my way back into the house or stay put and play it cool? I know my L will fight for it. W already put a passcode on the iphone, so I cannot get back into it.The phone is under my name, so It may be dissconnected or transfered into her name. I'll see as I just switched providers, and I will be hit hard on disconnecting. I will not pay for the phone bill though.
Me 31 Wife 34 (Step)D 15 /(Step)S 13 / D 6 Married 3/3/01 Separated 6/4/10 Bomb 6/14/10 Served 6/22/10 EA/PA Discovered 7/5/10 Now Back Together 8/1/10
I am starting to stress. I really want to confront W about this. I know...wait.
He phone is pass coded locked. I do not think I will ever get on that. I know she is using a pin I wont know. I dont think I get anymore intel this way. Its hard to concentrate on anything else.
Me 31 Wife 34 (Step)D 15 /(Step)S 13 / D 6 Married 3/3/01 Separated 6/4/10 Bomb 6/14/10 Served 6/22/10 EA/PA Discovered 7/5/10 Now Back Together 8/1/10
D -Pick up da phone!!!!!!!!! -We have no power -Texxt me wen u get there kkk
W -I made it tucker and I are gettin settled in our room!
D -That good does russ know yet
W -So far so good yup he knows but he at work so now he countin the hrs till he geT off work -Is dad in house? -Tomorrow I'll see him tomorrow for breakfast
D -Haaa wow he so excited i bet
W -Yeah he is he can't believe I came early
D -Lmao that so funny what he said wen u first told him
W -Well I gave him a hint and he didn't get it big goof ball lol I told him I had a surprise for him and I'd tell him when I hit shrevport lol he didn't catch on lol
D -Lmao nah redneck ha Lmao wowzer wen he jumped out the window did he fall head first or did a burning door hit his head lmao
W -Haha poor russ he aint all there and u clown my dumbass lol Lol
D -Lol everything will be alright.......i hope tell russs the south says wuzzzz uppp my homie lol nite
W -Nite
----------
W -Doin?
D -Watching ncis how was breakfast
W -Never ate breaky, I'm eatin papa johns right now haha
D -Haha met up wit russ yet
W -Yeah this mornin b4 he went to bed he very nice ----
D -What y'all doin?
W -Good just got back to hotel had drinks with the friend
Me 31 Wife 34 (Step)D 15 /(Step)S 13 / D 6 Married 3/3/01 Separated 6/4/10 Bomb 6/14/10 Served 6/22/10 EA/PA Discovered 7/5/10 Now Back Together 8/1/10
W -Thanks for coming to visit! I'd tag u on FB but I have no idea how lol !
C -Lol! You type @and the name! Had a great time girl! Hope u have a great night!
W -Oh I did and will !!! Hehehehe I'm hormonal lmao! Grrrrrr need a man !!! Lmao
C -Lol! Few more days and u will!!!!!
W -I know girl it so hard to talk to him on the phone and not be able to reach out and touch u know lol!
C -Lol i know!
W -Hahahaha I must b freaking crazy! This is crazy! Someone lock me in the looney bin!
Me 31 Wife 34 (Step)D 15 /(Step)S 13 / D 6 Married 3/3/01 Separated 6/4/10 Bomb 6/14/10 Served 6/22/10 EA/PA Discovered 7/5/10 Now Back Together 8/1/10
W -No Russ and I don't talk online so no he was watching what I did online
C -Ohh! Good!!!
W -Keeep eyes wide open !!!! For a good looking single man ready for a good lay!!!!
C -Lmfao!!
W -Hahahahhaha. :o) okay!!! It true lol!!! So drunk lol come save me!!!!
C -Hahaaa
W -Baby come save me I'm serious !!! Lol I need some Lovin!!!
C -Lmao Haha :o) where is Russ?
W -I think at work I'm with Marty! Lmao they pickin on me cause I can't type lol
C -Haha
W -Hahahaha it true I had said earlier I was eating pizza and drinking pizza !
C -Haha. Silly girl!
W -Lol u know me girl!!! Where the men!!!!
C -Haha
W -Date with Russ tonight?!
C -Yeah
W -Nervous?!
W -No
C -Whatttttt I want details!
Me 31 Wife 34 (Step)D 15 /(Step)S 13 / D 6 Married 3/3/01 Separated 6/4/10 Bomb 6/14/10 Served 6/22/10 EA/PA Discovered 7/5/10 Now Back Together 8/1/10
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.