You are in my thoughts. I am hearing a lot of the same things that my F is doing in your post. ( being in charge of the communication and saying one things then doing another, ping-ponging) What my F seems to be doing is trying to only play with the ball in his court so it has been very hard to stay strong. But every time we do communicate I look forward to knowing that I stayed strong and kept up with the DR steps suggested.
I know it is hard but every time you communicate try to sound as confident and busy as you can so you sound (and will eventually) independent and strong.
Stay in there i know I am, I really trust in my feelings and my devotion so I continue to remind myself that I know him and he knows me and it wasn't always bad!
Warm thoughts to you!
Me:25 fiance :29 about to be 30 in Sept. together: 7.5 years situation: separated 2.5 months
